Isolation In The Suburbs

I thought moving to the suburbs would be filled with socializing, kids playing in the streets and backyards, and meeting all sorts of great people.

I imagined it would be the way it was during my childhood.

I'm not outrageously outgoing, but I don't have a problem starting small talk with a perfect stranger.

So, to that end, I have met people while living here for the past 5 years, but haven't connected with anyone to the point where I can consider calling them for a spontaneous gathering.

It seems that people are so absorbed with their children's extracurricular activities that they leave very little time to simply gather together over drinks and a simple dinner while the kids run around in their pajamas playing together. They book their time so that they're too exhausted to do anything else.

I feel lonely to tell you the truth.

It's especially difficult when living in a climate where going outside means dressing from head to toe and staying outside just long enough to avoid frostbite.

So going to the park is out. Anyplace indoors costs an arm and a leg and with 3 kids on differing schedules, it's virtually impossible doing anything during the week.

My kids have playdates with their friends (which is another issue....what happened to a kid spontaneously knocking on the door asking if anyone is available to play? It's all so planned anymore and don't tell me times are different nowadays. No one is more at risk for danger than they were when we were kids), but parents use it as time to get things done rather than gather and chat over coffee, cocktails, snacks, whatever!!

There are a lot of demands and obligations that having a family imposes, but there are times when a casual gathering isn't so out of order.

This isn't a criticsm, persay. Every family has their way of living their lives and doing what's best for them.

I guess I'd like to find friends who are laid back and not so planny planny.