Mom Wants A Diabetes Cure

Thursday, May 31, 2007

The Slacker In Me

There is a woman I've been made aware of through beginnertriathlete.com who has cancer. She overcame breast cancer only to have the cells return and find homes in her bones and lymph nodes and other parts of her body. She'll be undergoing chemotherapy. The doctor says it's treatable, but not curable. It seems she'll be battling cancer for the rest of her life. And she'll being doing so while staying on her training schedule. She has cancer and she's still training. She's going through her first course of chemo tomorrow and on Saturday plans to compete in a triathlon.

Our very own OC member, Anne, is training for the Ironman!! The mack daddy of all triathlons. She has diabetes and has to track her blood sugars and worry that she'll go low during a lonely trek down the road. She's pushing her body to the maximum while filling in as an organ for crying out loud!

I on the other hand am healthy. I don't have the burden of cancer, or diabetes, or any other condition or illness.

Yet I've settled for mediocrity throughout my training and let sore muscles and lack of motivation stop me from achieving progress.

I'm feeling shameful because I have the luxury of a healthy body and I'm not making full use of its abilities.

I can spout all I want about staying on course, towing the line, keeping my nose to the grindstone. My intentions would be to train to my fullest potential.

But I settle for mediocrity. I allow myself to perform to the least of my abilities.

I wonder why I do that? I'm still searching for the answer and I hope I find it so that I can correct that flaw in me.

I don't want to have a fight for my life...or health...facing me to keep my motivation high. I don't want to have to prove that I can overcome adversity to achieve my goal.

I just want to be able to train and enjoy the fact that I'm not limited by debilitating chemo or having to keep track of my blood sugar.

I want to enjoy the luxury of freedom.

3 Comments:

  • You can do it. Because I could look at your first posts about the tri and how excited and motivated you were. Maybe looking at those would help.

    (Yeah, doing it because YOU HAVE TO is kind of a PITA.)

    By Blogger Rachel..., at 5/31/2007 8:53 PM  

  • Each person needs to find their own motivation for training and find what is inside of them to drive them over the finish line. My gf is training for her first ironman and each day is a battle for her to give it her all at training. One person's motivation may make another person not want to go out to train at all.

    Although, being diagnosed with diabetes has given me extra motivation to continue to train and work out harder than ever before. Prooving to others that I can do what they think I can't has always been motivation for me; now I just have one more log on the fire.

    If you look deep enough you'll be able to find all the logs you need to get the drive to train hard each day.

    By Blogger Wingman, at 6/04/2007 11:15 AM  

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