Mom Wants A Diabetes Cure

Monday, March 27, 2006

Comic Relief

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next
door won't turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You take naps.
17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset,
rather than settle, your stomach.
19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms
and pregnancy tests.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good shit."
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going
to drink that much again."
23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
25. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate
them instead of asking "Oh shit what the hell happened?"
26: You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign
that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old


  • yeah i go to geneseo ... except i'm taking this semester off and next too - but i'll be back. it's a really good college :-D the parties are good too haha ... i'm in a sorority there ... do you guys live by geneseo?

    By Blogger bethany, at 3/27/2006 1:52 PM  

  • My husband grew up in Monroe, NY and we actually lived in Newburgh before we moved to NH.

    I've been told it's a really good school.

    I went to Glassboro State (now known as Rowan University). It was a suitcase college, but was known for its partying ways ;)

    By Blogger Shannon, at 3/27/2006 2:11 PM  

  • Oh no I am old!! I passed all of these!
    Theother day on a blog...I wish Icoudl remember the name....she said, you know you are old when your shirt and pants touch!

    By Blogger Tongue in Cheek Antiques, at 3/27/2006 2:32 PM  

  • Oh my shirt and pants touch. I'd look like Britney Spears on crack if I showed my stomach.

    By Blogger Shannon, at 3/27/2006 3:01 PM  

  • Brittany Spears on crack?? LOL...Anyway, no comment on all those questions. ;)

    By Blogger Johnboy, at 3/27/2006 6:17 PM  

  • Well, maybe not that bad, but I'd have to be on crack to show my stomach at least, LOL.

    By Blogger Shannon, at 3/27/2006 6:40 PM  

  • You count as "old" when someone call you "sir" instead of "dude." I'm trying to gather all the "does-it-counts" at my site.

    By Blogger Does it Count, at 3/27/2006 8:07 PM  

  • OK that was hilarious.... I'm passing this along to friends! xo

    By Blogger Martha O'Connor, at 3/27/2006 9:04 PM  

  • I got as far as number 2, then snorted so hard with laughter that my drink came out of my nose! I hadn't realised how true that is until I read it!

    I guess I'm pretty grown up, but number 26 doesn't quite apply ;-)

    By Anonymous caro, at 3/28/2006 3:13 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home